What is up with that wonderful person who’s always standing so close to that horrible woman Michele Bachmann!  He’s a snappy dresser and by his mannerisms I can tell he’s a friend of Dorothy’s!  Hello rainbow warrior!  I’m having fantasy dreams about this guy!  This person the right age for Jeffrey!!  I’m not looking for the perfect person, but mercy, I haven’t seen that much mincing since Thanksgiving Pie! 

Someone told me his name is Marcus!  What a butch name!  Marcus!  He must be her hairdresser or her makeup artist.  And believe me … she needs a professional with all that hate spilling forth from her huge pores!  Just imagine how much Oil of Olay that woman goes through just to tame those crazy laugh lines.  And believe me, nothing is that freakin’ funny! That poor Marcus having to stand there with that awful witch…and to think she believes in reparative therapy for us gays! 

Puh-leeze!  Jeffrey is NOT in need of repair!  Well, maybe a nip and tuck later down the road, but repair?! Never!  How did Ms. Bachmann ever get elected?  Isn’t there a competency test in Minnesota?  She needs an updated history book as well … something besides that Bible she’s always misquoting!  Jeezy-peezy … she gets me all upset just thinking about how she is so 10 millenniums ago!  And to think, she’s holding back my Marcus from being a star! 

Oh, I could just watch Marcus forever!  He’s movements are so fluid and his hand gestures so wispy!  His body just screams modern dance & jazz hands!  I bet he loves musical theater as much as I do!  Just the type of man that my heart goes pitter-patter for!  Marcus and Jeffrey forever!  When will I get to meet this man of my dreams?!